Nothing justifies breaking my hand or destroying my ability to write. Injuring my hand and making fun of my journaling, processing, or self-improvement is wrong. Maybe I can’t get over all the ways I was punished. I worked hard to be in public, took rejections seriously, and informed the police of issues, all to avoid being given a hard time. Instead, you used shouting, my head size, face, body type, or leggings as excuses to shout at me and make fun of my appearance. This doesn’t mean I deserve it or have a history of not being good enough.

I haven’t forgotten the difficulties or being told no, or the fact that no one knows me. I haven’t been given a hard time only to have my reputation destroyed and be disregarded if it happens again. It doesn’t mean I’m not cool or friendly. Shouting at me with headphones on, a world peace show of communicating to me, instead made fun of my issues, sexuality, and resume.

I don’t have to be involved in politics, be rejected, told I’m nobody, or taken off meds to be disabled. Being told I’m too late, not going to make it, will get mental illness, or am sick and losing support doesn’t mean I’m having a difficulty that can’t be helped. I think I’m honest and don’t try to win or be supported as if it’s a game.

I’m going to stay well despite everyone hating me, shouting at me, and getting voices disconnected. Losing hate websites in whatever way, for however long, until the voices let up. I accept my losses and hard work in writing, even if it loses value